Funny Mottos help make you..

#1 in the #2 business.

Funny mottos are an excellent addition to your business card. They are short, to the point and pack a wallop, all while leaving a smile on the prospects face.

They can do double duty on your service vehicle like the curtain and blind cleaning company that has "***Caution*** This vehicle is being driven by a blind man! "

Funny mottos are not always appropriate.

It's your call if your funeral home has : "Drive carefully, we'll wait" or "Try our layaway plan".

As a plastic surgeon you might not want to have "Can I pick your nose?" as your memorable moniker.

Keep your mind open to unique phrases or different ways of looking at your business.

I'm sure you have seen many others. Drop us a line and we will give you a shout out.


  • We're number 1 in the number 2 business.
  • Satisfaction Guaranteed or double your water back!
  • We boldly go where others have gone
  • The Number 1 man for the Number 2 Job
  • Pumping Unlimited (septic company) big intitials on its truck PU
  • Plumber: "A good flush beat a full house."
  • Nobody puts their nose in our business
  • Drain Surgeon
  • We are Plumb Loco about plumbing
  • We install the best seat in the house.
  • Your poop is our bread and butter
  • We repair what your husband fixed.
  • If it weren't for your plumber, you'd have no place to go!
  • Don't put up with a drip - call your plumber
  • Septic Tank & Sewer:

  • Satisfaction Guaranteed or double your product back!
  • A royal flush beats a full house.
  • You dump it, we pump it!
  • Doctors:

  • Podiatrist's Time wounds all heels.
  • Optometrist: If you don't see what you're looking for, you need us
  • Dentist: Be true to your teeth or they will be false to you.
  • Plastic Surgeon: Can I pick your nose?
  • Dentist: We find your need and fill it.
  • Dentist: We cater to cowards.
  • Retail Store:

  • Custards Last Stand
  • Maternity Shop : We are open on labor day
  • Hot tub store: We want to get you into hot water
  • Barbeque sales: Tank heaven for little grills
  • Pizza shop: 7 days without pizza makes one weak
  • Truck stop: Eat here - diet home
  • Country store: We buy junk and sell antiques
  • Compass sales: Buy one or get lost!
  • Churches:

  • To remove worry wrinkles, get your faith lifted
  • Services:

  • Exhaust Workshop No appointment necessary. We hear you coming
  • Auto Body Shop: May we have the next dents?
  • Taxidermist's: We really know our stuff
  • Garbage Truck : We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
  • Garbage Trucks: Our business is picking up!
  • Electrician: "Our Price wont SHOCK you"
  • travel agent's: We want you to GO Away!
  • Beauty salon: Well, Hair we Are
  • Bakery: When you sleep, we loaf.
  • Concrete Company: We dry harder.
  • Pastery Shops: Get your buns in here.
  • Car Wash: We take a bite out of your grime.
  • Massage Studio: Isn’t it great to be kneaded?.
  • Sod Installation: We just keep rolling a lawn.
  • Diaper Service: We can lighten you load."
  • Window Cleaner: You pane is our pleasure.
  • Auto Repair: We meet you by accident."
  • Restaurant: Hungry? Don't stand there. Come in and get fed up.
  • Auto body shop: You bend it, we mend it.
  • Hardwood flooring: Just say no to rugs.
  • Tire shop: Invite us to your next blowout."
  • Carpenter: You should see what I saw
  • Tow Truck: We don't want an arm and a leg, just your tows
  • Dump Truck: We Find a Need and Fill It.
  • What you didn't find on this page of funny mottos are phrases that have sexual connotations associated. While some of them can be a bit humorous you really need to think this through.

    Do you want your vehicles and employees going around town with a phrase representing your company that some (or many) people might consider sexist, demeaning or downright vulgar?

    Would you want someone that you don't know with this emblazoned on their shirt showing up to give a proposal to your wife or mother?

    You might even give yourself some extra motivation with the thought that if an employee was ever unjustly accused of inappropriate behavior to the opposite sex and his/her work shirt or business card contained offending would that look? Hmmm?

    Funny mottos are meant to be just that, funny and eye-catching, use them and laugh as you go to the bank.

    Return from Funny Mottos & go to Tag Lines

    Return from Funny Mottos & go to Small Business Ideas

    As a side note...

    I enjoy finding and hearing about unique businesses and the ways owners market their business. That's the overall theme of this site.

    I know you have that same kind of interest and knowledge in something.

    It could be knitting, Nascar, hunting or old pocket watches.

    Have you ever thought that perhaps there might be a way to earn additional income with that knowledge and passion?. Take a look...


    List of mottos pg 1

    Latin mottos pg 2

    Funny mottos pg 3

    Famous mottos pg 4

    Cool life mottos pg 5

    State mottos pg 6

    Florida State motto pg 7

    Senior class mottos pg 8

    Mottos and quotes pg 9